The Mangler On Sports

I hadn't realised that "The Longest Yard", a movie about a prison football team, was based on the Saskatchewan Roughriders. But apparently 'Riders GM Roy Shivers has been doing his recruiting at the local penatentiary. Last year he turned a blind eye to the actions of HIV-carrying linebacker Trevis Smith, not only deciding to keep his situation a secret from other teams' medical staffs, but also allowing him carouse about the town. Only police custody was able to remove him from the active roster. Now this year running back Kenton Keith has been charged with assault. Most everybody assumed he would be suspended by the team until his trial is concluded, but Shivers had other plans. The fact that this is seen as an organizational embarassment, as well as the lacklustre onfield performance from the team over Shivers' entire tenure as GM would normally be enough to get him fired, but apparently not in Regina. Is it any wonder why this team hasn't cracked the top half of the standings since the 1970s?

Speaking of criminals, howabout Ricky Williams? We were all told about how this NFL star would rampage through CFL defenses, but he has been a complete bust, and now has a broken arm. Only 231 yards up until his injury, and it looks good on Toronto. Let players who've been suspended for numerous NFL drug violations stay off the field. Combine Williams with John Avery and you have a pair of useless RBs making about half a million dollars between them.

How long before Dany Maciocia gets fired? The Eskimos have looked listless and unprepared on offense for every game to date. Their 2-3 record is flattering, yet it could easily be an above .500 3-2. The Esks almost stumbled to victory over Winnipeg, but an unbelieveable 100 yard hail mary pass on the last play of the game gave them a deserved loss. Maciocia seemed unable to explain why they chose to blitz when they could have simply lined up 9 men at midfield and the Blue Bombers wouldn't have had any hope of finding the end zone.

Looks like business as usual for Montreal. The Alouettes are undeafeated through five games, in what is becoming a formality. But despite nearly a decade of jumping out to fantastic starts, the Als have only once captured the Grey Cup and often finish the season the season with a good, but unremarkable record. Will it be the same story this year?